Flowermountains

Toilet Philosophy

With the term ‘toilet philosophy’ I don’t mean philosophies that are ready to be flushed down the toilet, nor philosophies regarding toilets. With it I mean actual philosophizing while being at the toilet. If this sounds too obscure for you, you’re really missing out on the greatest opportunities of life! Consider this as a gentle introduction.

The most straightforward type of toilet philosophies concerns the kind of stuff you’re actually busy with while being there. I don’t really like to go into much more detail here, so I’ll just give an example:

Easy, understandable, true (in a way), and straightforward. Let’s move on to the second category. It could very well happen that you get a bit bored with the actual toilet business. In that case, you might spend some time thinking about life (in general, and yours in particular). This leads to something that might be termed ‘philosophies about life, the universe, and everything’. This would of course be utterly useless and incomprehensible without an example:

This one might be a bit on the depressing side, but still, that’s completely up to you! Is there more? Of course. Now we get to the most interesting and deep bit. This is the category of philosophies that require a flash of genius (or madness), do not necessarily make any sense, but are special in some way or another. Of course, if there’s no example it doesn’t exist, so here you go:

On first view, you probably can’t make any chocolate out of it, but still it shows some glimpse of genius (or, again, madness). This category is clearly my favorite, but you shouldn’t be too disappointed if you don’t produce something like this every day. That’s it, I hope it enlightened your life.

Just as a reference, the philosophies shown here as examples can be found in the men’s room in the basement of the social science faculty of the university of Oslo, second unit from the entrance.